That’s right. I said it, and I mean it. I am a hypocrite. I wish it wasn’t so, but it is, and while it’s not something I’m proud to say, I truly believe it’s something I need to say. I hope this inspires others to also let go of their insecurities and “Confess their trespasses to one another, pray for one another, and be healed, (because) the effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much” (James 5:16).

Let’s start with an obvious statement that must be said – no Christian sets out to be a hypocrite. In fact, most of us wake up with the very simple goal of being faithful every single day. I’m not sure there’s a verbal acknowledgement of that goal, but there’s certainly a hidden drive to do better or be better.

The real problem lies in our definition of faithful. Far too often, we equate that idea to perfection. That’s our first mistake and ultimately a debilitating one because we know it’s impossible to be sinless, even though we try. That misguided definition crushes us when we fail or give in to temptation. It sets an impossible goal just beyond our reach and if we’re not careful, separates us from the reality of our own salvation and God’s grace.

Too many Christians (myself included) are really good at hiding our sin from others so our reputation remains spotless even when our conscience is seared. It doesn’t matter what we’re hiding, hiding it is dangerous, maybe even deadly. If you happen to add a healthy mix of shame and sorrow to the guilt that accompanies that sin you find a situation that can easily turn ugly fast.

Thankfully, with a mixture of repentance and forgiveness, you can wash that shame and guilt away with a genuine trust in God and the blood of Christ. After God does His part, and you come to terms with your own weakness, a pattern can develop to give you a clean conscience before God.

You see…

I am a sinner, but I’m saved by God’s grace. I am a hypocrite, but I’m trying each day not to be. I am wrong, but in my weakness I see how great is My God.

There’s a ton of Scripture to help us understand this but ultimately, I believe these three really stick out:

Romans 8:26 “Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.”

How thankful can we be that God Himself “groans” on our behalf when the struggle we face is more than expected? That “groaning or sighing” comes from the Greek word stenagmos which is only found one other place in the New Testament (Acts 7:34). There it is used to describe the “groaning” of the Hebrew slaves in Egypt that God heard before sending Moses to free them. I can’t help but make the connection that the Holy Spirit groans on our behalf because He feels our pain, knows our sorrows, and understands our weakness.

Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and my heart fail; but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

There are passages galore that point us to God and His strength. In fact, four different verses in the Old Testament (Exodus 15:2; Psalm 28:7, 118:14, and Isaiah 12:2) emphatically say “The Lord is my strength.” Not many Christians will argue that God is weak, but many do forget how strong He truly can be right now at this very moment. We do that because it’s easy to see God from a distance, on His Holy Mountain, to busy or even occupied to worry about my needs. When we do that, we unfortunately rely on our own strength and far too often fail miserably. That’s why I personally love this passage because it points out first that “even though I fail, God is still strong.” At my lowest, in my weakest, and on those days when my hypocrisy abounds, it’s reassuring to remember “when I am weak, He is strong.”

First Peter 5:6-7  “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”

The idea that resonates most in this passage is the phrase “in due time.” I must admit that I’m not a very patient person. I often find myself wondering when will God get to work. When will His timing match up to my timing? The humility it takes to wait on God is not always something I possess, however, the more I cast my concerns on Him (see Proverbs 3:5), the more I let go, the more trust, the more I actually see His care for me.

Right now, more than any time in my life, I’m thankful for Isaiah 64:8 which says, “But now, O Lord, You are our Father; We are the clay, and You our potter; And all we are the work of Your hand.”

I’m not thankful to be a hypocrite and I wish no one had ever thought of me as one. Since I can’t change that, I’ll work every day to be better than I was yesterday. Some days I’ll fail at that goal and some days I’ll be better. No matter the outcome, every single day I’ll be grateful to be an unformed lump of clay. I’ll be satisfied with what I am and content with what I’m not yet. I’ll be grateful that my Heavenly Father isn’t done making me over and thankful my sins are forgiven.

I am a hypocrite but my life is not defined by that imperfection, it is defined by God’s perfection working on me.

Identity is an important part of our modern society. In fact, it might just be the single most-discussed topic of the day. Identity is the driving force behind movements, political divides, and even religious bigotry. So, who am I and why does it matter?

Let me start by trying to answer the question above – who am I? Secular reasoning wants us to believe our identity should be seen as an ongoing process. Rather than a static snapshot, we should embrace a flowing sense of self, whereby we are perpetually reframing, reorganizing, rethinking, and reconsidering ourselves.¹ That fluid, theoretical view (and meaning) gives room for interpretation in every single choice, every single idea, and every single facet of life. However, it fails to give genuine, inherent, tangible meaning to just about anything and creates a world where I’m free to be whatever I choose to be despite the ethical, moral, biological, or theological implications.

I’m sure that the Word of God describes it must more concretely. Instead of a constant evolution of self-identity, God paints a different picture when He inspires the Apostle Paul to say, “by the grace of God I am what I am,” in First Corinthians 15:10.

In that passage, the Apostle doesn’t excuse his sin, or overinflate his worth. He simply honors God’s redemptive work.

The Apostle Paul knew, “that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief,” (1 Timothy 1:15) and was unwilling to hide from his previous self. He boldly declared “I have lived in all good conscience before God until this day,” in Acts 23:1, yet was confident enough to also say, “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God – through Jesus Christ our Lord!” in Romans 7:24-25.

He knew who he was, a sinner saved by God’s grace. So am I. That identity supersedes every other identity I possess.

Over the next few weeks, I’m going to explore several different identities that Christians can be fairly and unfairly labeled. From hypocrites to saints, Pharisees to fundamentalists, I’ll explore them one-at-a-time and answer the question, “Who am I?” Maybe I am a hypocrite and a fundamentalist, maybe I’m not. Hopefully, at the end of this series, we’ll find some common ground and you’ll see what I see – who I am is much more complicated that a simple term or idea. It just might be the most important question I ever ask myself.

Resources

¹ Follow this link to read more from Psychology Today.

It’s Fall, my favorite time of the year. That means cooler temperatures, changing colors on the trees, bonfires, and, if we like it or not, pumpkin spice everywhere. I hope you enjoy the wonder of Fall, but if not, don’t worry too much. Your favorite season will be here soon enough. 

When seasons change, it makes me think, do we see the seasons changing in our own lives? Do we see the leaves falling, the temperature rising, and the inevitability of another season done when it happens to us? The answer is profoundly simple, sometimes we do and sometimes we don’t. 

I’m not sure what season of life you find yourself in right now. I hope it’s a joyous one, worthy of celebration. I hope it’s a contemplative one, encouraging growth when you can’t even see it. Honestly, I know it’s a rough one for some of you. It’s full of heartache, agony, and uncertainty. 

Whatever season you find yourself in right now, I want you to know another season is coming. It may be for the better or the worse, no matter what, it is coming. That’s why I urge you to remember the famous words of Ecclesiastes 3:1, “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven.” 

Your season has purpose, even if that purpose isn’t something you see just yet and I know God can take this season and do something really good with it.

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Originally published on September 25, 2022 in the Three Forks Church of Christ Bulletin

Let’s be brutally honest for a minute, life is hard. And it tempts us to think less of ourselves than we should. 

It’s hard when you’re a child learning from those around you who aren’t always patient. It’s hard when you’re an adult trying to impart wisdom on an ungrateful generation. It’s hard when you’re old enough to be wise but too old be considered helpful. It’s hard when you’re too young to be respected but incredibly respectful. 

It’s hard when you feel undervalued, underappreciated, and underused. It’s hard when you feel overwhelmed, overworked, and stretched too thin. It’s hard to be the one in the center of the room leading everyone and it’s hard to be a follower doing the best you can in relative obscurity. 

It’s hard to be a man, unable to show emotion without the label of weakling. It’s hard to be a woman, unable to show emotion without the label of basket case. It’s hard to be a teenager, unable to show emotion without the label of dramatic (or moody). 

Life is hard, we all know that. Thankfully, without any reservation, Jesus lived this difficult life. He cried, He hurt, He knew what it was like to be overlooked, ignored, and undervalued. That’s why Hebrews 4:15 means so much to me because “we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin.”

Almost 42 years ago a baby boy was born to a young couple in Bowling Green, Kentucky. That boy was named after his grandfather, a simple man who worked hard, loved his family, and knew what it meant to be faithful. Today, that baby has grown into a man who longs to tell you why his grandfather matters.

Raymond Neal Keown passed away recently. His death was not welcomed by any means, but it was a relief to those who had watched him suffer. My grandfather’s health had been steadily declining over the last few months. After several falls and a couple of head injuries, the toll had taken its effect and his body just couldn’t sustain life anymore. Like everyone who’s ever lived, his time came to an end. He was surrounded by family and loved to the very end. He is still loved today and will be missed immensely. His place can’t be taken and his loss will leave a hole in the lives of everyone who knew him.

For those of you who didn’t know him, I’d like to take a minute to tell you about my grandfather. He was a man of faith and few words. A man I respected, loved, and hope to honor with these words. He left me an inheritance I can’t quite quantify. It wasn’t a pile of gold or silver, it was an inheritance of faith.

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.

Proverbs 13:22

He was faithful to his family. For those of us fortunate enough to be his, that was always known. He didn’t have to say “I love you” to see it in his actions. All of his grandchildren can remember fondly sitting in his lap, staying at his house, playing in his yard, and sitting at his table. We never went without, he made sure of that. He was constantly a part of our lives from the ball field to the graduation ceremony.

He was faithful to his country. While I don’t know many of the details, the stories he chose to tell of his service in Europe during the Korean War were memorable. I’ll never forget how he described the first night in Germany as a “cold he had never felt before.” Just a few years ago, the city of Bowling Green honored him and my uncles for their service. It was nice to know more than a few noticed his service.

He was faithful to his job. My grandfather spent the majority of his life working for the railroad. First, the L & N and then CSX. I remember his loyalty to them, going out to fix crossings on holidays, and the honor they bestowed upon him at his retirement. He was a man who knew what to do and how to do it. In his later life, he picked up an odd job here and there. One of them was for a local company. The owner of that company came to the funeral and told all of us that our grandfather was the best man he ever knew.

Finally, he was faithful to God. While I never saw him stand up and lead a song or a prayer or even preach a sermon, I still know his faith was secure. Until he was sick, he didn’t miss services. He came as often as he could. In fact, as a child, when you stayed at his house you knew Sunday morning was a day to rise early. Services would begin at 9:30 am, but we’d never arrive later than 9. Part of me knows he wanted that seat, but part of me realizes it was about getting there to save the seat for those he loved. He knew they’d be there, he knew it was important to be there as well. He knew rising to go to the house of the Lord was important because he was faithful.

Raymond Neal Keown was a great man. No one will write books about him, no one will dedicate a building to him, and most of the world will ignore or overlook his passing, but those who love him know why the world has lost a giant. They know how important he was and will continue to be. At his funeral, I read two verses that seemed to be the most appropriate. One was mentioned earlier, the other is here. I pray that when the time comes for me to be remembered, my grandson (or granddaughter) will believe it’s fitting as well.

Grandchildren are the crown of old men. And the glory of sons is their fathers.

Proverbs 17:6

He was my grandfather, the strongest man I ever knew, and I am his namesake. I pray that one day my life will say the same things his did. I pray I’ll be remembered for being a faithful man. I pray my children and grandchildren will rise up and thank the world for me.

• – Raymond Neal Mathis

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Scripture quotations taken from the NASB, (c) The Lockman Foundation.